TaTaT2
06:30 Wednesday 23 Jan 08
A couple of posts ago I mentioned that I was debating a site move. Someone left a snide comment that because this was on the web I could do what I wanted then move on and reinvent myself. I am changing domains, I do intend to blog less contentiously, I do intend to blog better but I’m not doing it to reinvent myself.
This blog started in it’s current form in January 2004. Between then and now my family has changed, we went through bankruptcy, my mental health went from up to down many times and has now settled somewhere closer to the norm, I have aged and now see certain things in a different light, much of my anger and frustration has waned (though it will return of that I am sure) and none of this is reinvention. It’s how things are and things change. This domain is now wrapped around memories and choices which I made at the time and they were right at the time – but much like the haircuts we get, the clothes we wear, the foods we eat and maybe even the music we like our tastes over time change. We are no different than we were 5 years ago because we are still the same person but we are very different on the inside. Just because it is on the net does not mean it has to stay on the net. Just because there is digital evidence at archive.org does not mean you should be able to come back to a site to see the same state. I’m not ashamed of what was here, I would defend what I said at the time, my family all know and have read whatever they wish it’s just that I will feel more comfortable without it around me – in precisely the same way that I left ‘podz’ behind.
In around 2001 I met some people from uk.people.bodyart for the first time. We all shared an interest in bodyart but if we were all to meet up again then while our interest maybe close to the same level our participation would have dropped (I’d not let Martin pierce my hand again for instance…) But we aren’t reinventing ourselves – we are just changing as people do.
I get some comments on really old posts and when I go back to read the post I most of the time have no clue what on earth I was on when I wrote whatever the post was. It reads like it was written by a stranger – and given what has happened between then and now maybe I would be.
Am I doing it because of work? Nope. If you have read this blog for a long time you will have seen the post frequency fall and just recently it fell a lot more. That happened incidentally. The recent part – yes there was a reason and no it was not work.
Anyway…… all the posts and pages here were made private. I’m not deleting it, but it’s just for me should I choose (which is like those embarrassing photos we all have but won’t throw away but won’t show). Some posts are back published – those I like or whose comments are well worth reading ( I apologise for the feed doing what it did). Some other posts will follow because I know they exist I just can’t find them yet. The new domain is bought (today, so there is no history to google…) and when there is a theme I’ll drop back to this post and edit the link in.
There were:
3,150 posts.
10,148 comments.
2,063 different nicknames represented in the comments.
Post 3152 will not happen.
Thanks for putting up with me here :)
1
Opened feeddemon and thought you’d been a busy boy :-)
13:57 Wednesday 23 Jan 08
2
amazing, exactly the same with me. registered my domain and and had my site in its current form since feb 2004 and i look back in wonder. everything has changed, my style of writing, what I write about and there were periods where I never wrote anything. i too am debating what to do with the site, its like a stream of thoughts which leads in different directions…best wishes with whatever you do.
19:40 Thursday 24 Jan 08
3
I’m late, as always, in replying.
But anyway…I’ve done the same thing with my own site. I think everyone goes through this kind of thing at some point with some aspect of his life – if not more. It’s just normal change, evolution if you will. Anyone who doesn’t respect that of you, is only misguided in themselves.
21:44 Saturday 2 Feb 08
4
Your anger has waned?! I don’t know you any more, man…
05:20 Monday 4 Feb 08
5
Good luck, I think you have done the right thing. A couple of quotes came to me as I was reading this.
“To change skins, evolve into new cycles, I feel one has to learn to discard. If one changes internally, one should not continue to live with the same objects. They reflect one’s mind and the psyche of yesterday. I throw away what has no dynamic, living use.”
~Anais Nin
And one of my favourites:
“Absorb what is useful, Discard what is not, Add what is uniquely your own.”
~Bruce Lee
I think once you reach certain points in life, in order to move forward you have to let go of those things that are no longer relevant or are capable of un-usefully clouding your mind to a point where they weigh you down, and burden you when trying to move forward in new directions. Be they possession’s, habits, pre-coneceptions, or people – sometimes we have to let go in order to take hold of something else. As an old zen proverb says “you must empty your cup, before you can fill it up.”.
That was unusually philosophical of me. I hope to see you back elsewhere soon!
22:09 Monday 4 Feb 08
6
Funny… I just hit Post 100 and looking back I can see a definite pattern, I can see how I’ve moved through examining what this disease I’ve got is, to my recovery to how those of us with the disease can help each other… and so on. I’ve tried, over the past year, to keep Things separate… Recovery on one blog, hobby on another and fun stuff on a third. I’ve never been able to combine them into one blog, but keeping them separate has meant abandoning two of them to concentrate on the other.
Dude, whatever you do, wherever you end up, I hope the writing helps.
18:08 Thursday 21 Feb 08
7
Hi just surfed in and read your last post…Seems you have gone above and beyond in your committment to your journal writting. Chances are sometimes you reach a point were very plain and simple…albeit functional, as in my case is what is desired.
You have to mold your space to fit your own needs,and moods… you are answerable to you, alone, and it is you who will determine when change is warrented. Perhaps you want color, style, whatever it is that you seek, hope you sort it out and are happy with it, hope you continue to write and share. Hope you never feel an obligation to answer to the kindly soul who thinks you are trying to “reinvent” yourself…lol.
20:43 Tuesday 4 Mar 08
8
Thanks Donna :)
And I did actually edit the link in :)
22:15 Tuesday 4 Mar 08
9
[...] our beloved WordPress Genius Mark (aka “Podz”) is making changes to how he hopes to be viewed on the web in the future and how he now makes [...]
12:36 Friday 28 Mar 08
10
No matter.
Its been a fantastic blog, a great experience and a beautiful ride.
And your new blog will still get the odd reader I would think.
Been a bit busy err working recently. :)
19:11 Saturday 5 Apr 08
11
You return! Excellent!
19:24 Saturday 5 Apr 08
12
I no I am so late here, but I just came across your WordPress page with all the great tutorials. I hope that you do get this comment, just so you will know that your WordPress stuff is the best I have come across in all my learning. I hope in some wya Iget an address of your new move so I can keep up with you.
Thanks
JIM
17:29 Tuesday 23 Jun 09